T@lk witH MuM 3@@@ 12032012

mami,

breaking up does not mean tat the relationship is over or the memory tat belong a person once we been together can be vanished. there were times i always reflect back on the memory me and him... times cannot go back as we always wanted it to be... if it really can go back, i think i will never lose u and the wound could be healed easily so that it wont haunt me as long as i can still remember it........ mi, maybe i could understand dad feeling now... tat day while having dinner with dad, seeing he curious on terence because he can't contact with him make me feel miserable........ i suddenly felt tat he so lonely.... but mi, dunno u know or not... i believe tat daddy really miss u... tat y, he be with the siam girl... he rather choose that girl whose look bad than u make me believe tat he really miss u and love u... mimi, papa really miss u... he really alone without u... i didn't angry with him d mami... just tat i dun have the courage to go back only... i scare of losing him like i lose STH & LMC... i know how papa feel cause i also have this feeling now... althought i break with him for a year plus d but my mind still have him exist in it... no matter how i wanna delete it the memoir of him always appear in me.... lately i always secretly see his photo... seeing him happy makes me feel tat maybe is a correct thing that we break up..... maybe i am really not a girl for him but i feel regret... regret for making a fool of myself.... as i given him my first time..... i feel like i am so dirty..... mimi, if last time i take ur advise to break with him, probably i wont be in tis conflict nw... i am still haunted by the feeling of scare... i dunno how to cease it at all.....

mi a,
sometime i really dunno how to communicate with him at all... he beh understand my feeling and never tolerate with my feeling at all... mi, u always know tat the daughter of u, (me) appreciate every single thing that belong to me... if i care tat thing it means that the things is meant a lot to me.... ma, last thurs nite, while we two on net using my laptop, sud his bro bang my laptop like my laptop is worth nothing at all to him.... the sound... i feel so pain inside my heart cause i never like tis to his laptop at all.... tis laptop i buy with my hard earned money and also his family always discriminate me... he didnt even try to understand my feeling... i cried because they done tis to my laptop... i just hope they all will respect me... i help them with the house chores last time, but when i realise tat they everything also wanna depend on me i stop from doing all the house chores for them... they didn't even respect me and appreciate me... tat y thr a nite i go to beach with chester again........ even though he came but i also dunno how to talk to him and let him know........ after his laptop bang my laptop, i cried but he didnt even care.. he just say to me, "Y U CRY OVER THIS SMALL THING"?????........ AFTER he said out tis word, my heart more pain............. mi... pls tell me what should i do.......... pls..................... i need ur guidance.....................