hurting and breaking heart............

mami,

i am back... today a bit late talk with u... i am so sorry mami... i had done something wrong... i need to learn on how to be strong...i know u wan me to be strong but mami... so sorry to say tat i had been trying to be strong but sometimes it turns out that it is really hard...

mami,

today dunno y i ask someone y wan to hug me, hold me and then just let me off,,,, as what i predicted... he din ans and also cant give me the answer... perhaps his action now gave me the answer d... mami, i really need to let go d rite.... in fact i should have let go long time ago... i really need to let him go and carry on with my life.... i wont forget him but i will let him off d... i will stop being fren and nice as i am not really tat good... i knew if i keep on nice to him, i my own will let myself in pain and hurt...

mami, sheng ask me out to celebrate christmas eve and new year eve together... these 4 years he never ask me out and even ask me to stay at home for these days... these years, he asked me out but i decline d...i dun have the feeling anymore... my heart so stiff now... i am thinking on writing a letter to him after we signed the paper.... he maybe will treat it as something to let our relationship to be better in future but for me it was real... maybe i am not his girl and he may find his second... short pain better than long pain... i will take our single back time to see clearly whether we both suit each other or not.... i will focus more on my career... by this way only i can stop my heart from hurt and pain.... perhaps i should not be into any relationship... then no pain for both side.... we both hurt in this relationship... due to my heart is dead now... i cant give him any feeling... and i dun understand y must things happen to the worst only a person will know what is important and how to treasure the person he grab the hand... i dun wan till this moment only he knw how to cherish me... he waited till my heart die then only knw how to cherish me... i really need time to help me prove his changes and his willingness...


mami, i promise to be strong and let go the feeling on someone... i promise to be strong and be the duaghter u wan me to be k.... perhaps i will be sad for these weeks but i swear to you that i will recover soon... love you mami...

good night.... miss u....